Insomnia is not a joke...
I hate sleepless nights.
When my brain is so messy that I just cannot calm it down enough for it to finally shut the fuck up.
At least I could be in a creative flow, but no.
It is like there are 50 tabs open in a browser, and a drunk raccoon keeps clicking on them continuously.
I am waiting for a system crash or something, but somehow the blue screen of death doesn’t want to come.
My brain finds every single reason not to fall asleep—from being hungry to being too sleepy to sleep. An annoying itch on my leg... really, anything.
I know I am actually spiraling around something. My mind wants to tell me something, but that raccoon is way too drunk.
I am too tired to think, to focus, to find that one single tab that annoys the hell out of me.
I wonder what grilled raccoon tastes like...
And the best thing is that the thing I am spiraling around can be anything.
Anything from something so unimportant, like forgetting to put a period at the end of an email to support 10 years ago...
To forgetting that I have surgery tomorrow, and if I miss it, I will get a new appointment in 2035.
Either way, it is terribly annoying.
I think it is better if I just start walking around the house and look into every corner. Maybe I will figure out what my actual problem is.
Or not.
But maybe I'll find the meaning of life in the meantime.